Marriage Myths

Myth: a widely held but false belief or idea.

Myths are dangerous things. They tempt us to believe anything is possible. We succumb to their power to coerce us to think, feel or believe differently. Driven or clouded by body chemistry or emotions, we tend to gauge everything on how we feel about a particular person, situation or occurrence. Myths are dangerous. They deceive us. They allow us to believe in something that isn’t real. I believe the spiritual life is all about becoming real-the real person God intended us to become. For most of us, it takes years of serious work to get to ‘real.’ But, I assure you, the journey is worth it. Just ask the Velveteen Rabbit.

There are millions of us wandering around the globe with painful yearnings that could be met if we spent less time seeking human companionship and spent more time seeking God. The illusive yet longed for love and state of fulfillment are outcomes of a right relationship with God. But, we look for them, as the song goes…’in all the wrong places.” We place an unrealistic heavy mantle onto the person we ‘love’ by expecting them to be our everything and to somehow complete us. We’ve been duped into believing we can find someone perfect that will help fill our emptiness, help define our purpose and destiny or help redeem our imperfections. There are a lot of us out there looking for a savior.

Sometimes the search for a savior is one that takes us down a road toward believing another human being can somehow save us from our current dismal situation. It’s like believing the fairytale we’ve heard a thousand times. A damsel in distress lives a tragic, unloved, unfulfilled life. Suddenly, a threatening situation occurs and she yearns for a Prince Charming to come along and save her. The prince shows up at just the right time and saves her! After a beautiful coronation and wedding, the royal couple rides off into the sunset to live happily ever after. The end.

While this dramatic story line works well for poets, authors and film makers, it’s not a plot line for living a life of grace and truth. Grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. (John 1:17) 

This Sunday we unpack some widely held myths about marriage. In their book Fit to be Tied, Bill and Lynne Hybles suggest there are four marriage myths: 1) marriage will end loneliness; 2) marriage will heal one's brokenness; 3) marriage will ensure one's happiness; 4) marriage is for everyone. I know there are many more myths. Honestly, we each inherit a lot of myth variations and deceptions when it comes to marriage and singleness. So this weekend, we’ve invited two well-seasoned professionals to share their insights with us. Pastors Terry Clark and Roger Jenks have years of experience and a wide range of insights to enrich us and encourage us on the road to living the life we’ve always wanted and having a marriage that fulfills every aspect of our hopes and dreams. See you in church.

I am the Gate. Anyone who goes through me will be cared for—will freely go in and out, and find pasture. A thief is only there to steal and kill and destroy. I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of. John 10:8-10 The Message