Bill and I are huge movie buffs. We will watch some movies multiple times, be able to anticipate the banter between characters and say the favorite line along with the character. We love Indiana Jones, Tom Cruise, 007—James Bond, Jane Austen and great movie classics like Casablanca. We really enjoy Chinese films and the efforts Chinese directors take in their cinematography.
Conflict makes a great story.
No conflict, no story. Indiana Jones is a master of disaster—he finds inventive ways of getting out of sticky situations and he gets the girl in the end. Indy is the super smart university professor who leads trusted friends into the ancient world of discovery. Great stories provide an illustration for how to deal with a conflict—a problem, a confrontation or a fight. Does it mean that in order to tell a good story our characters must face each other in an epic battle? Not at all. Although conflict in film can be represented by combat (there are thousands of stories about battles and wars), it’s a whole lot more than that. Conflict is what drives the plot, makes us empathize with the characters and what compels us to keep watching because we want to know how it will be resolved.
How we deal with conflict reveals who we are at our core.
How do you feel about conflict? Feel? Conflict is emotional. It wreaks havoc in our brain and produces physiological experiences in our bodies. * Think about the last time you had a conflict to work out—how did it go? How did you feel before, during and after? Was there any resolution or solution? Ongoing conflict is very challenging and why some people simply ‘give in or give up.’ Think about a family system that’s been ruled by overt or covert conflict. Tragically, this is why family secrets and abuse is so dangerous. It is amazing how one single person can do so much damage or how a bully will reduce others to feeling insignificant or not valuable.
We can certainly learn skills on how to deal with conflict and I believe that’s one of the reasons we love the films that we do. Because in a great story, we can learn how other people whom we identify with deal with conflict and win. There can be no victory without a winner.
You will be my witnesses. (Acts 1:8)
I find it fascinating that Jesus expects us to tell stories. As Jesus leaves the disciples and is taken up into glory, he makes this statement, "But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” (Acts 1:8) A witness tells a story from their point of view. Our story can be instrumental in how other people come to Christ. A great story can reveal how a Christian dealt with conflict and became an inspiration for others. If you say you’re a Christian, how you deal with conflict is a sure-fire way to reveal Jesus himself…or not. It’s also a way to measure our Christ-likeness which is what discipleship is all about.
How we deal with conflict and struggle is evidence and a gauge as to how Christ-like we truly are becoming. And of course, it’s situational. Sometimes we deal with conflict straight on. Other times we wait on God. The key to dealing with conflict in a Christ-like manner is how we listen—how surrendered we are to Christ—and how brave we can be with the power of the Holy Spirit within us.
Conflict is inevitable. It’s part of a normal life. Think about the last time you dealt with conflict. Would Jesus be proud of you…or is there room for improvement?
a. How about breakfast this morning mom or dad? (You’re teaching your kids how to handle conflict.)
b. How about reconciling your financial resources spouses? (You’re becoming more Christ-like in your marriage.)
c. How about the last ZOOM call you had? (You’re revealing to the world what you believe about Jesus and his value of others.)
The Discipleship Explored material helps us plumb the depths and riches of the Apostle Paul’s letter to the Philippian church. This is what Paul says, "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus…” (Philippians 2:3-5)
Pastor Jen